Skip to main content

If You Get To The Cemetery, You've Gone Too Far

A couple of weeks ago, I had a very bad weekend.  I was in a very dark place.  I didn't get out of bed for two days.  I consumed nothing but coffee.  I did get up to shower.  But, not having my boys here, I couldn't think of a reason to get up.  And after letting myself go back to that place that landed me in the hospital, I was having a difficult time coming up with a reason to live.  Thankfully, the right person sent the right text at the right time and snapped me out of it.  I have two very important reasons to live.  My boys need me.  And I need them.

My counselor suggested I come up with a "safety plan" for when I come to this place again.  Part of that safety plan involves having a go to person.  Someone I can trust, and go to, who will understand what I need.  And know if I need to get help.  I have one friend in particular who came to mind.  I told her that I wanted to see her, that I have a favor to ask of her.  I've never been to her house and she was giving me directions.  At the very end she said, "If you get to the cemetery, you've gone to far."  This statement struck me as quite funny, based on the reason I was going to visit her.  I am basically asking her to keep me from going too far.  To keep me from ending up in the cemetery.

I haven't gone back to that place.  I am finding reasons to get out of bed when the boys are with their dad.  And I am finding things to look forward to.  I am going to be ok.  I have my safety plan, but I'm pretty sure that I won't need to use that plan.  But just in case, I've got my friend to keep me from going too far.

Comments

Jenn said…
What a great quip - if you get to the cemetary, you've gone too far. Isn't that the truth for all of us, really. I'm glad you are finding more & more reasons to get up every day. I love reading your blog and seeing how you discover the simple things in life again. Like working out so hard, that it hurts. I'm excited to hear about your next workout, I have a feeling it's going to be a good one :)
Anonymous said…
As a single dad I am very happy to have what some would perceive to be a “small family”. three children, two dogs, one cat, and yes the pets are part of our family. It’s not the size of the family that counts but the family inside that counts. Have a great day....

help for single Dads

Popular posts from this blog

Today Sucks

Today is our 13th wedding anniversary.  Tomorrow is the 1 year anniversary of me finding out about the other woman, and two days after that is when we agreed to end the marriage.  This weekend I'm moving out of my house.  Basically the week sucks.  Then throw in the anniversary of my miscarriage fourth of July weekend, and I may as well put myself back in the psych ward for the next 3 weeks.  Yesterday I spent the day mourning what had been my life.  The boys went with their dad for father's day, and I lay in bed sobbing and crying and wishing it would all go away.  I remembered all of the awesome fun times we had as a family.  I thought about our wedding day, the days the boys were born.  The fun times we had together.  Tonight they will be with him too.  I'm going to go for a long ride and run, and then come home and probably cry just a little more.  Then, tomorrow, I will move on.  I will pick up the pieces...

Nutrition Failure

I have three main obstacles preventing me from being the best possible triathlete I could be.  Two of them I have no control over, time and money.  I can't make more hours in the day than there are, and my money situation isn't going to change any time soon.  The third obstacle is my nutrition.  This is the one area that I can fix, and I'm having a very hard time with it.  I want to eat right, and want to fuel my body properly, but need lots of help in this area. Now that the holiday's are past, and we are back into more of a normal routine, I'm trying to force myself into healthy eating habits, and trying to drag the two non-willing members of my family with me.  The trouble is, I'm not really good at the planning healthy meals.  Dinner's I'm pretty good at.  I have been getting better and better at planning a weeks worth of healthy meals, and the boys usually eat them.  But breakfast and lunch I'm not so good at.  Especially since I ...

Triathlon Ramblings

My first triathlon of the season is four weeks from today.  I'm pretty sure I am going to bonk, hard core, but I will finish the race on my own two feet.  This training as a single mom is a little harder than I thought.  Especially with both boys having activities that take up time.  I'm hoping to get on the bike  course at least once prior to the race.  Was supposed to ride today, but my training partner got scared off by the rain.  I still love her any way.  Came to the realization this afternoon that Green Lakes tri takes place on what will most likely be day two of my cycle.  This is not a good thing.  Really hope I'm late this cycle, so that I don't have to worry about it.  I know you don't need to know this, but it's kind of freaking me out.   One thing I had hoped to avoid until I don't feel like a newbie triathlete anymore.   Sometimes men don't know how easy they have it!   Really would still appreciat...