Skip to main content

I Resolve

I never used to make New Year's Resolutions.  I found them silly.  A waste of time, since few people ever stuck to them.  Then, in 2009 I made a two part resolution.  Part one was to put myself first, to make 2009 the year of Caroline.  Part 2 was to run a 5k by years end.  The two relied on each other.  I needed to make time for myself in order to start running.  And having a goal made sure that I was actually doing something for me for a change.  My boys had always come first.  As did my husband.  I never made plans for myself without first making sure that everyone else was taken care of.  If the husband wanted to go out, I would just stay home.  If there was a birthday party to go to, I would make sure they got to the party.  New clothes, kids come first, I can wear whatever fits.  You get the point.  I needed to start worrying about my own happiness as much as everyone else's.  I needed to remember that I mattered too.

That resolution changed my life.  In both good and bad ways.  It is the reason my marriage ended.  By putting myself first, I put my marriage second.   It made him question my love for him. It caused an unrepairable rift in our relationship.  But, it also caused me to find triathlon.  Had I not been training to run a 5k, I would have never considered signing up for Iron Girl.  I would not have made positive changes in my lifestyle, to make myself happy and healthy.  Do I regret the resolution?  The verdict is still out on that one.

2010 I didn't make a resolution.  I set goals, but none of them were accomplished due to my life falling apart.  I did get to do Iron Girl.  And I did complete it in a faster time than the year before, but not as fast as I would have liked.  I think 2010 goes down in the record books as the worst year of my life, and I am going to be glad to see it end.  So, do I make a resolution for 2011?  Or do I just set some goals, and hope for a better outcome than last year?

I am going to make a resolution.  I resolve to be the best possible mother to my boys.  And in order to do that, I must start taking better care of myself.  All three of us need to eat better.  We need to incorporate more fruits and vegetables into our diet.  We need to eat healthier snacks.  And we need to spend less time "plugged in".  Cell phones, TV, internet, video games.  Those need to stop being such a priority in our lives.  

I also resolve to make peace with my past.  I can't change what I've done to end up in this place.  I can't focus on the what ifs and shouldas So I need to accept the fact that this is my reality, and make the best of it.  Focus on the future.  And all three of us need to get some counseling.  If I can't get a grip on the separation emotionally, how are two little boys who have no idea what their future may hold either be able to?

2011 is going to be the year of acceptance and change.   Only good things can come of both, right?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Today Sucks

Today is our 13th wedding anniversary.  Tomorrow is the 1 year anniversary of me finding out about the other woman, and two days after that is when we agreed to end the marriage.  This weekend I'm moving out of my house.  Basically the week sucks.  Then throw in the anniversary of my miscarriage fourth of July weekend, and I may as well put myself back in the psych ward for the next 3 weeks.  Yesterday I spent the day mourning what had been my life.  The boys went with their dad for father's day, and I lay in bed sobbing and crying and wishing it would all go away.  I remembered all of the awesome fun times we had as a family.  I thought about our wedding day, the days the boys were born.  The fun times we had together.  Tonight they will be with him too.  I'm going to go for a long ride and run, and then come home and probably cry just a little more.  Then, tomorrow, I will move on.  I will pick up the pieces...

Nutrition Failure

I have three main obstacles preventing me from being the best possible triathlete I could be.  Two of them I have no control over, time and money.  I can't make more hours in the day than there are, and my money situation isn't going to change any time soon.  The third obstacle is my nutrition.  This is the one area that I can fix, and I'm having a very hard time with it.  I want to eat right, and want to fuel my body properly, but need lots of help in this area. Now that the holiday's are past, and we are back into more of a normal routine, I'm trying to force myself into healthy eating habits, and trying to drag the two non-willing members of my family with me.  The trouble is, I'm not really good at the planning healthy meals.  Dinner's I'm pretty good at.  I have been getting better and better at planning a weeks worth of healthy meals, and the boys usually eat them.  But breakfast and lunch I'm not so good at.  Especially since I ...

Triathlon Ramblings

My first triathlon of the season is four weeks from today.  I'm pretty sure I am going to bonk, hard core, but I will finish the race on my own two feet.  This training as a single mom is a little harder than I thought.  Especially with both boys having activities that take up time.  I'm hoping to get on the bike  course at least once prior to the race.  Was supposed to ride today, but my training partner got scared off by the rain.  I still love her any way.  Came to the realization this afternoon that Green Lakes tri takes place on what will most likely be day two of my cycle.  This is not a good thing.  Really hope I'm late this cycle, so that I don't have to worry about it.  I know you don't need to know this, but it's kind of freaking me out.   One thing I had hoped to avoid until I don't feel like a newbie triathlete anymore.   Sometimes men don't know how easy they have it!   Really would still appreciat...